I used to think there was a measure of perfection needed to sit in the counselor’s seat. I would put on that hat and believe my life had to perfectly reflect everything I said and everything I did. The pressure of wanting to be authentic with my clients and yet knowing I still wrestled with my own issues was a difficult journey that God took me on. It didn’t take very long fresh out of school for me to realize that I was no different than the clients on the opposite chair of me. They came to me admitting their weaknesses, embracing the hardship, knowing they were in the valley of the shadow of death. They were an inspiration to me. I felt privileged to enter their grief, to witness the power of transformation. I listened, I wept, I entered the valley with them.
Who needed perfection there anyway? I just wanted to sit with them and be present. God
allowed those valleys in my own life to transform me. To shape me. To bring me closer to his heart and vulnerability. It was through my own life struggles personally and relationally where He transformed me the greatest. I had to surrender to someone outside my control in the valley. To trust that He knew better. I wasn’t perfect after all, and no one expected that out of me but myself.
To believe in the power of perfection truly is counter-intuitive to being a Christ-follower. The journey of letting go begins with salvation, but the process of sanctification means I am in a process of dying to myself daily. Not a physical death, but a spiritual one. I am learning how to let go. I am surrendering over to the one who can and will complete this holy work in me. I am learning to embrace that I don’t have to be perfect at all, even to still sit in the counselor seat. In fact, striving to be perfect only stands in my way of surrender. It is a phantom feeling of control.
If I believe I must be perfect, I really don’t need God anyway. Surrender feels like a scary word sometimes. But when you realize you were never made to carry that cross it is actually liberating. There was only the Perfect One capable of it all. He was made to be the perfect sacrifice, without blemish without fault. And Guess what? Because of that great gift, you are perfect. You are without blemish, without fault, in the eyes of God. We will still struggle with sin on this side of heaven, but in God’s eyes if you put your trust and faith in Him, you are now seen as perfect as His son. “For by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy”. (Hebrews 10:14) That encourages me. That makes me rest in my weaknesses knowing that through Christ, He oversees that transformation process in our hearts.
He is working it out for you. You don’t have to strive for that perfection, in fact it may exhaust you knowing how unattainable it is. It is a lie. A phantom feeling of control. Surrender to the Perfect One and embrace that you are imperfectly perfect in His grace and love. Only there is where the real freedom journey begins!
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